


disintegration | adachi tooru

by nihilisten



Series: my reader inserts [1]
Category: Persona 4
Genre: Eccentric Reader, Eventual Romance, F/M, Manipulative Relationship, Mutual twistedness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-25
Updated: 2017-05-08
Packaged: 2018-10-23 22:34:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 10
Words: 11,046
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10728645
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nihilisten/pseuds/nihilisten
Summary: Adachi was bored.Y/N was bored.That's how their little game started.[adachi tooru/reader]





	1. domino dancing

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first reader insert in English, so if you notice errors or weird phrasing, please let me know.  
> Actually, I was surprised that there are no Adachi/Reader stories where the reader isn't another vulnerable victim of Adachi's scheming. So, here you are: Adachi finally meets his match!

It wasn’t the first time he’d seen her, Inaba wasn’t all that huge, after all. But after failed attempts to recall who the woman in front of him actually was, Adachi gave up. Since she visited the police station, it was at least expectable of her to explain her business, anyway.

“Yes, how can I help you?” He put on his signature, clumsy-but-kindly smile. The woman—or maybe still a girl? She certainly couldn’t be older than twenty—was nice to look at, with all equipment a female would need, so he briefly let his gaze sweep over her curves. Yeah, not bad at all. At least something good happened on this shitty day.

“It’s about burglary. Someone broke into my house and stole my TV set,” the woman said calmly, but her palms twitched in annoyance. “I wonder if there’s anything you can do about it.”

Upon hearing her words, Adachi frowned. A TV? Why would someone bother stealing a TV? And what’s more, why did this woman seem so concerned over it? People are getting dumber and dumber these days.

Or could it be…

She was interested in Midnight Channel?

He tried his best not to overreact. Her concern over a stolen TV didn’t automatically mean she could enter it or anything. Plus, the rumours spread like wildfire, so it was no surprise people kept blabbering about the world inside the TV. The question was if there was more shit Adachi had to take care of, like that goodhearted idiot whom he talked into kidnapping potential victims.

What a pain, he thought.

“Your name?”

“(Y/N) (L/N),” she fiddled with the hem of her shirt, thoughtful look on her face. “I know it might sound stupid, but it really bothers me. Nobody ever broke into my house before and there is that serial killer running wild recently… Can you help me, Adachi-san?”

Oh, so she knew who he was. But then again, who didn’t? The nice and trustworthy detective, Doujima’s slave, the good guy in the town. Bullshit.

“I-I will do my best, (L/N)-san,” he gave her an awkward smile and she visibly relaxed. Good for her. “First, I think I should go to your house to look for any possible clues. Is that all right with you?”

“Yes, please!” (Y/N) chirped, making him think there was something wrong with her. Nobody in their right mind makes such faces at a police station. “If you have time, let's go right away. I really am worried.”

“Oh… Okay.”

Following her to the door, Adachi’s expression suddenly darkened. For some reason the woman didn’t look dumb to him anymore—now he felt like there was something utterly suspicious about her, and he certainly _didn’t_ like that.

But then again, what threat could she possibly pose?

Adachi held back a grin. That’s right—none. Even if she tried anything funny, he had the upper hand.

* * *

“This is the room. Please go inside.”

Adachi put on a concerned look and entered the room first. He really wanted to get it over with, but with every passing second he was more and more convinced there really _was_ something fishy going on with that (L/N) girl. Who’d make a fuss over a TV, anyway?

He looked around the room, not noticing anything at the first glance. It was neat and small, like a perfect place for a single woman to live in, and anything but a place for a burglar to break into. (Y/N) didn’t look like she was rich, so Adachi couldn’t see why someone would steal anything from here—at least until he saw a TV placed on the table.

“Huh?” He’d have forgotten to play dumbstruck if he wasn’t already. Red alert burst inside his head. “But (L/N)-san, isn’t that a TV—“

There was a sound of the door closing behind (Y/N) as she stepped into the room. Like a scene from a horror movie, suddenly Adachi imagined her pushing him into the TV and almost burst out laughing.

“I’m sorry, Adachi-san, I tricked you.”

“What?” His voice came out more harsh than he intended.

“I wanted to make sure. You… can enter the TV world, right?”

Sudden rage swept over him. He wanted to laugh at her, mock her, make her suffer—anything to make that annoying face of hers disappear—but no sound left his mouth as he stared at her in shock. She didn’t seem to notice.

“So you can,” she sighed, looking genuinely sad as she said this. “So that also means you’re the real killer.”

For a second Adachi pondered if he should continue playing dumb, but it seemed like nonsense anymore. The bitch knew—somehow, he must have overlooked her snuffing around and now she saw right through him.

“I see,” he took one step towards her and she didn’t even flinch. “You set a trap for me. What are you gonna do now? Call the ‘real’ cops?”

She shook her head.

“None of the sort, Adachi-san.”

“Shut up. Adachi-san this, Adachi-san that, can you help me and yet you are just another ungrateful whore,” he spat out, glancing at her with murderous look in his eyes. “Oh well. It’s not like you’ll have a chance to do anything anymore.”

Another step. She stood still.

“But before you join my little friends there,” he pointed to the TV, “I shall have my deal of fun with you.”

He grabbed her head by the hair, trying to kiss her, and she pulled away slightly. Adachi’s lips landed on (Y/N)’s neck, earning a yelp from her. He smirked and let her run around the table, chasing after her like a hunter pursuing his prey. When she reached the corner, he caught up with her, trapping her with his arms. His palms travelled over her body, finally slapping her ass and she squeaked weakly, as if she didn’t want to make a sound.

Just what was wrong with her? Why didn’t she scream for help?

Suddenly Adachi lost the desire for fun. Harshly pushing her towards the TV, he made the last attempt to let out his anger.

After that second, he laughed bitterly. Was he going paranoid or what?

However, he didn’t feel better in the slightest.

Killing her right now probably wasn’t the smartest idea. It looked like she lived alone, but that didn’t mean someone hadn’t seen him talking to her at the police station. If anyone put two and two together Adachi would be deep in shit.

Grabbing her jaw to prevent (Y/N) from moving, he bit her neck and forcefully pushed her body. She tried to stop the fall by waving her arms around, but it was too late—there was no sound as she fell inside the TV.

Panting, Adachi quickly backed away, eyes glued to the blurry screen. The red alert from before didn’t disappear completely and for a second he thought (Y/N) was going to jump back here and attack him.

After that second, he laughed bitterly. Was he going paranoid or what?

However, he didn’t feel better in the slightest.

Killing her right now probably wasn’t the smartest idea. It looked like she lived alone, but that didn’t mean someone hadn’t seen him talking to her at the police station. If anyone put two and two together Adachi would be deep in shit.

Dammit!

He rushed outside to his car, hoping that nobody noticed his absence at the station. He wasn’t in the mood for being accused of murder.

Not yet.


	2. compulsion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, what do I say now? Omiai is a Japanese matchmaking custom, google it if you're interested. I got this idea from an Adachi doujinshi, haha...  
> By the way, genmaicha is really delicious!

“Hey Adachi, wanna come over for a dinner today? Yuu said he’d cook something,” Doujima suggested, lighting a cigarette. They were walking the street from work and the older man was apparently in a good mood.

“Um, I’m sorry, sir. I have  _omiai_  today,” Adachi answered nonchalantly, making his boss nearly drop the cigarette.

“ _Omiai_? You mean you’re finally getting married?”

 _Why are you surprised_ , Adachi thought disgruntled. He had bad luck with the opposite sex, sure, but that didn’t mean he had none.

“N-no, nothing like that,” he did his best to look flustered. “It’s just that the old lady who always makes me  _nimono_  apparently knows someone who’d make a perfect wife for me, or so she said. I couldn’t possibly turn her down.”

That much was true. Adachi got so angry when the old hag suggested  _omiai_  that he could either yell at her, which meant throwing his friendly disguise out of the window, or just say nothing to the weird idea. Easy to guess what he’d chosen.

“So you’re meeting the girl, huh?” Doujima laughed. “Pity I can’t be there to see it.”

“Doujima-san! I’m just doing it out of politeness!” Adachi made a miserable face, which only made his boss laugh again.

* * *

When he got to the old woman’s house, she almost pulled him inside, blabbering about how happy she was to see him. Having told him to wait in the living room, she went for the girl he was about to meet. After she left, Adachi sighed with annoyance. What a pain in the ass, as if he already wasn’t busy enough—

“Sorry for the wait, Tooru-chan,” the old lady who appeared at the door nodded to the person standing beside her. “Come in, (Y/N)-chan.”

Adachi had to stop himself from jumping up to his feet and got up slowly instead. He must have misheard her. He  _had_  to. (Y/N) wasn’t a name popular enough to be a coincidence.

However, his hopes soon were shattered as he saw the girl’s face.

No. Fucking. Way.

The person who entered the room—who was supposed to be his ‘perfect wife’—was none other than (Y/N) (L/N).

After the door closed behind the smiling old lady, leaving the two alone, Adachi just stood there, completely dumbstruck. (Y/N) looked at him with a face devoid of expression, but he could have sworn he saw a triumphant gleam in her eyes.

There was an awkward silence, broken by (Y/N).

“Please sit down, Adachi-san,” she gestured to the low Japanese-style table in the middle of the room. He obeyed absent-mindedly, and she followed.

Adachi glanced at her, noticing how different she looked from yesterday. She wasn’t the same worried woman who’d come to the police station, begging for help—though she certainly  _never_  looked scared or vulnerable. Today, though, (Y/N) was a perfect picture of femme fatale, light make-up on her delicate face and girly outfit nicely bringing out her features. Still, the lack of provocation in her appearance was what Adachi found  _provocative_.

(Y/N) reached to the teapot on the table and poured tea to the cups like a good housewife.

“I’m sure you’re shocked to see me,” she started.

“Shocked? This is utter bullshit,” Adachi groaned.

“However, you may want to remain calm. My grandma’s friend is a nice woman, we shouldn’t disturb her or… make her know about unnecessary things.”

Adachi cursed under his breath. How on earth did he end up here, with a woman he should have fucking murdered, not able to do as much as touch her right now? He felt like he was caught in a very nasty trap. However, (Y/N) was right; this was no place nor time to make a scene.

“Guess so,” he shrugged.

“You must be wondering why I’m here,” (Y/N) took a sip of her tea and Adachi followed suit.  _Genmaicha_. Not bad. “I discovered my power by accident and didn’t really use it before. The voice in my head was annoying, that’s all. However, it came in handy after our… little quarrel yesterday,” she smiled slightly.

“Power? You mean a Persona?” Adachi forced himself not to sound like he cared.

“Yes. This is why I could escape the TV world after proving my assumptions right.”

Assumptions my ass, Adachi thought. This was really irritating that some stupid slut found out he was the killer.

“So what do you want from me? You could have me imprisoned any second now.”

That wasn't true; Adachi knew what to say to the police to prove the bitch crazy, while remaining completely free of accusations himself. But she didn't need to know and he’d gladly take satisfaction in ridiculing her in public.

(Y/N), however, only shook her head.

“Don’t worry, Adachi-san. I have no intention of revealing your little secret.”

“Well then? What is it?” He was getting impatient and the fact that some bitch was making demands annoyed him enough.

“I’ll get straight to the point: I want you to play my boyfriend. That’s why I suggested  _omiai_  to the old lady in the first place. She adores you and I can’t say I don’t see why,” (Y/N)’s eyes gleamed when she looked at him.

“Excuse me?” Adachi couldn’t believe his ears. “Boyfriend?”

“I’ve had my eyes on you for quite a while, Adachi-san, and you certainly are interesting,” she smirked, making Adachi want to punch her. “I’m fascinated how you hide your true face and nobody ever noticed.”

He groaned, frustrated that he was seen through.

“So what if I do,” he shrugged.

“I want to observe you, and playing couple would be a great excuse to stick around with you. Plus, aren’t we just meant for each other?” (Y/N) looked like a kid who just got a new toy—and decapitated it right away. “We share the same power and are equally bored with life.”

“It's quite risky dating a murderer, you know,” was the best response Adachi could afford.

“Worry not, I’m far from careless. If I was ever asked why I kept silent about your crimes, a story about my undying love for you would suffice just well. A few tears here and there and anyone will buy it.”

Adachi had to admit, she was smarter than she looked. It wasn’t rare that loving wives or girlfriends protected their corrupt significant others even if their crimes were painfully obvious. Quite clever of her.

(Y/N) smiled innocently and in that exact moment Adachi knew she was a devil in disguise.

“So you pretty much want to stalk me?”

“That is rather harshly put,” (Y/N) made an amused face. “I prefer to call it ‘research’. Other than simple curiosity, I have no particular reason to do so. Though I admit it feels satisfying to have a little advantage over you, Adachi-san.”

“Hey, watch your words,” he barked. “Even if I can’t kill you in the TV world, that doesn’t mean I can’t do it in more conventional ways.”

“I know, but you won’t. You're bored just like me, after all.”

Sly bitch.

They stared at each other for a few seconds, and Adachi found it really annoying that (Y/N) never avoided his gaze—almost mockingly. But what else could he expect from this smiling weirdo? She really must have loved dancing with death.

Just like him.

“So,” (Y/N) looked him in the eye with a smug grin, “doesn’t our partnership sound interesting to you?”

She hit the soft spot. Adachi bit his lip.

“But playing boyfriend? We aren’t some high school brats, you know.”

“I couldn’t think of anything better and you just wouldn’t believe me if I said I didn’t want anything,” (Y/N) smiled in a somehow twisted way. “So I thought ‘Why not as well have some fun?’. It’s not like you’re bad to look at and I bet you’ve got your needs, too. Let’s simply call it a mutually beneficial relationship.”

Mutually beneficial, huh? Adachi wasn’t dumb enough to get himself into that shit, but then again, he hadn’t had a good fuck in quite a while. If (Y/N) wanted him to play her boyfriend, she shouldn’t complain if he played a _good_ boyfriend.

Most importantly, she was right: he was bored as hell, so could as well agree to her weird idea—even if that whore was trouble.

“You're insane…” he muttered under his breath.

“Look who’s talking!” (Y/N) giggled and clapped her hands. “Well, I’m glad you made the best decision.”

“Who said I’m done?!” he snapped, but (Y/N) didn’t seem impressed in the slightest, mysterious smile hovering over her lips. Adachi huffed and ran his hand through his hair.

He was so done for.

“Okay, maybe I am,” he quickly gulped down his tea to cover up his annoyance, and pointed his finger at her. “But try anything and you’re  _dead_.”

“Rest assured. I promise you’re going to have the time of your life.”

Adachi opened his mouth, wanting to say something more—and then gave up. (Y/N)’s amused eyes never left his own.

It seemed he’d got himself one hell of a partner.


	3. roll with it

The next day after work Adachi found (Y/N) standing in front of the police station.

What’s worse, Doujima saw her too, as they were both leaving work.

“Tooru!” she exclaimed and run up to him, throwing her arms around his neck. Bewildered, Adachi weakly felt her breasts brushing against his chest. “I missed you so much!”

Glancing to the side, Adachi was pleased to notice Doujima’s shocked expression—not that he looked any better himself. Despite that, he decided to play along, having their deal in mind.

“You missed me already? But we only saw each other this morning…”

He flashed her what was supposed to be a loving smile, kissing the corner of her lips. She beamed and returned the kiss, and Adachi was pretty sure he could hear Doujima gasp.

He smirked to the kiss. Maybe this whole game wasn’t so bad, after all.

After (Y/N) pulled away, she turned to the older man with a somehow flustered expression. Adachi thought it really was amazing how she could change attitudes—but then again, who was he to talk?

“Oh, I’m so sorry, you must be Tooru’s boss,” (Y/N) bowed, her silky hair fluttering behind her. “I’m (Y/N) (L/N), his girlfriend. Thank you for always taking care of him.”

Adachi felt delight at the sight of astonished Doujima. The man quickly regained his composure, clearing his throat, and returned the bow.

“Nice to meet you. My name’s Ryoutarou Doujima. Are you…” he seemingly hesitated, “Are you the girl from  _omiai_  he went to yesterday?”

“Yes,” (Y/N) blushed, making Adachi wonder how the hell she could control  _that_. “I’m so glad I agreed, because otherwise I wouldn’t have met him!”

“Oh, c’mon,” Adachi laughed, wrapping his arm around her waist. She didn’t do as much as budge at the contact. “It must have been destiny. Right, Doujima-san?”

“Uh, I guess you two are busy, so I’d better get going,” Doujima grunted, embarrassed. “Try not to scare the girl away, Adachi.”

“Why don’t you have any faith in me?!” Adachi shouted after him, and then laughed, turning to (Y/N). “That wasn’t bad for a change. Poor guy was completely dumbstruck.”

“You’re horrible, teasing your boss like that,” (Y/N) commented, acting all calm and composed all of a sudden—still not letting go of Adachi’s neck.

“It was all your fault. You assaulted me before I even left the station.”

“It was simply part of my research.”

“You call that research?”

“I thought I made myself clear yesterday?”

Adachi’s eyes met her serious ones, and he gave up. It seemed (Y/N) wasn’t intending to suffocate him with her presence—after the  _omiai_  she only bothered telling the old lady she absolutely  _loved_  Adachi and that they are probably going to start dating. Still, it felt kind of weird for him to suddenly have a girlfriend, even if she was a fake one.

He shrugged, entwining fingers with her as they started walking.

“Yeah, yeah. Fancy a dinner at Junes?” he suggested indifferently.

“Sure, I’d love to.”

* * *

As they walked down the streets of Inaba, people were paying them weird glances, but Adachi ignored it. (Y/N), on the other hand, was either unaware of them or simply didn’t give two shits, skipping slightly as she held Adachi’s hand. The whole situation was unnatural and bizarre, but he got used to it all to soon, holding (Y/N)’s hand like they were a real couple.

Junes wasn’t crowded at that time of the day, so they chose a table in the back. The waitress came as soon as they sat down, and Adachi was damn sure she was shocked to see the town’s rookie detective number one with a girl.

“C-can I take your order?”

“That’d be beef bowl for me and…” he glanced at (Y/N), who was leafing through the menu. “What for you, honey?”

Honey. The word sounded almost like a joke in his mouth.

“I’d like chips, please.”

“Just that?” Adachi frowned, unsure as to what the poor order could mean.

“Yeah, don’t worry. If that’s not enough, you’ll share with me, won’t you?” she laughed.

The waitress left with shock written all over her face, and Adachi sighed. Luckily enough other customers weren’t as indiscreet.

“I always eat this little, no need to panic,” (Y/N) stated nonchalantly.

“I’m not panicking,” Adachi snickered. “I just feel like a bad boyfriend when my girl is underweight.”

“Oh, how did you know?”

“It takes a blind man not to notice.”

He glanced over her figure and had to admit that she was skinny, almost too skinny. (Y/N) probably was the type to eat too little on a daily basis and still consume huge amounts of sweets when she was in the mood.

“Hey, isn’t that Adachi-san?”

A sudden voice interrupted their conversation.

Adachi looked up; there were two silhouettes approaching them from the entrance. He let out a grunt, while (Y/N) looked quite amused.

“Who’s this? Your friends?”

He deadpanned. “You’ve got horrible taste in jokes, y’know.”

When (Y/N) suppressed her laughter, the two teenagers went up to their table. One of them, a boy with near silver hair, wore a serious expression, while the other had headphones around his neck and an easy-going look on his face. Adachi knew them better than he’d wished.

“Why hello, Yuu-kun, Yousuke-kun.”

“Adachi-san? It’s rare to see you here… eating dinner with someone,” Yousuke uttered.

“Oh really?”  _But what is it to you?_  “Haha! Well…”

“We thought it would be nice to eat outside this time,” (Y/N) explained quickly.

“Is this your girlfriend, Adachi-san?” asked Yuu.

Adachi knew the stupid kid wanted to make fun of him—his tone of voice implied there was  _no way_  Adachi would ever have a girlfriend. Well surprise, you little brat.

“Yes, she is! It’s (Y/N),” he explained, scratching the back of his neck. “These two are Yuu-kun and Yousuke-kun. They’re still high schoolers, so don’t tease them too much!”

“Oh, you go to high school?” (Y/N) was great at acting like she cared. “I graduated two years ago myself.”

“Really? I thought you’re our senpai, since you look so young…” Yousuke mumbled, completely bewitched with her, and Adachi felt a slight sting of annoyance.

“Actually, Yuu-kun is my boss’ nephew,” he quickly changed the topic. ”He moved here this spring.”

“Is that so?” (Y/N) put on an expression of polite interest. “How do you like Inaba so far?”

“It’s quiet, I enjoy living here. The people are really nice,” Yuu smiled slightly, elbowing his friend who still couldn’t take his eyes off (Y/N).

“Good to hear, then.”

“Yes,” Yuu nodded. “Well, we should get going. Please enjoy your meal.”

“W-what?!”

Ignoring Yousuke’s protests, Yuu grabbed his arm and dragged him to the exit. However, their conversation was still perfectly audible in the premises.

“B-but leader, how the hell did Adachi get a chick _this_ hot?! And before me?!”

“Be quiet, would you.”

Watching them leave, (Y/N) couldn’t hold back a giggle.

“Wow, he’s one polite kid,” she commented, playing with Adachi’s fingers under the table. “Looks like they’re having fun every day.”

“They’re just brats. Don’t mind them.”

“But it seems they trust you.”

Adachi noticed a mischievous gleam in her eyes, making him groan internally.

“Everyone in this boonies does, ‘cause they don’t know me,” he forced a whisper. “Except you.”

“Me?” (Y/N) fucking _laughed_ at him. “But I do trust you, Adachi-san—I mean, Tooru. You’re my precious _boyfriend_ , after all.”

(Y/N) flashed him a smile when a waitress brought their food, and Adachi couldn’t help but think that birds of a feather flock together. She starting biting on her chips, while he reluctantly grabbed his meat.

* * *

“I was able to see many amusing reactions from you today. Thank you for your cooperation,” (Y/N) bowed when they were about to split up.

“What’s with the sudden formality? I thought we’re so close now,” Adachi made an attempt to tease her.

“Well, I had fun. Is something wrong with my speech pattern?”

“Nah,” he’d already given up on her peculiar mannerism. “But if you want to thank me, be a good girlfriend and act like one.”

Without warning, he pulled her close and kissed her, teasing brush of his lips against hers. (Y/N) returned the kiss without hesitation, despite the fact they were in the middle of the street. Pleased by her cooperation, Adachi pulled away, studying her slightly flushed face.

“So, I guess I’ll see you tomorrow, (Y/N).”

He ruffled her hair before turning to walk away.

She followed him with her gaze until he was quite a distance away—and then smirked.

“Yeah, see you… Tooru.”


	4. stranger thoughts

Despite hanging out with her every day now, Adachi still didn’t know much about (Y/N) and it pissed him off.

Where did she work? Did she have any relatives? And, most importantly, what made her so twisted?—Adachi was itching to know, and this itself frustrated him. Even though he’d never admit it, he was slowly giving in to his new obsession.

After their fateful _omiai_ , (Y/N) never invited him to her house again. They always hung out around the town, eating dinner at Junes or going for long walks, townspeople’s curious glances never leaving them. Adachi wasn’t intending on letting her into his house, either, but she already knew too much about him. So one day he decided he didn’t need an invitation.

* * *

Early in the morning he phoned Doujima to tell him he must have caught a cold and sorry, but I absolutely cannot make it to work today, please don’t yell at me. Then, Adachi quickly left his house and taking the least crowded streets, drove to (Y/N)’s place. He was calm. She shouldn’t be home at that hour and it’s not like she needed anyone to look after her.

(Y/N)’s neighbourhood was the most remote in Inaba. Good for him. He parked the car near the bushes (freaking _bushes_ in the town, the world’s gone straight to shit) and walked up to her small lodging.

The door was closed, but what kind of detective would he be if he couldn’t take care of a simple lock?

The act of opening the door was simply a formality, similar to a woman losing her virginity, which made Adachi wonder if (Y/N) had been fucked before. If not, he’d gladly take that too. At the same time he felt sudden rage at the thought that someone else might have touched _his_ bitch. Maybe he should show (Y/N) her place—she should be aware that she belongs to him now.

Finally, the lock let go, along with a slight snap in his mind.

When Adachi stepped inside the house, his heart raced way faster than he’d expected. The house was as neat as the last time he’d been here, but he felt like something was different. Two rooms, the kitchen and the room that must have been the bathroom; that much certainly hadn’t changed—yet, he couldn’t help but think that a mystery awaits him behind the corner.

But which corner?

He passed the dark _genkan_ hall, ignoring the living room where he’d pushed her into the TV back then, and entered the room on the left. As expected, that was (Y/N)’s bedroom.

A wave of excitement went over him.

The room was small and had only three pieces of furniture: an uncomfortable-looking sofa (did she really sleep on the sofa? That would explain her attitude), a closet, and a chest of drawers.

Feeling the urge to look at her possessions, Adachi scrolled through the drawers, expecting to find at least some underwear. However, the first drawer didn’t even contain clothes; he found lots of used notebooks instead.

Adachi hummed. Now this was getting fun.

He took the topmost notebook at the first page. Much to his surprise, the words ‘TV WORLD’ were written on it.

And below: ‘Recently I’ve noticed I can put my hand into the TV screen. I wonder what that means’, along with a date—a year ago.

Then: ‘It seems not only my hand, but I can go into the TV completely. I did yesterday. The world inside looks like a place from my childhood nightmares. It’s so much fun.’

The notebook also contained various sketches of Shadows, all dated within the previous year. The more Adachi was getting to the present date, the more curious he was becoming.

Finally, the date from a month before: ‘I think Adachi-san, the police officer from the town, can go into the TV too. How do I know? Haha, I can’t say. Maybe it’s my Persona who told me. Everything is so weird here. But if it’s true, he must know that world is dangerous… I think I should observe him for the time being. This might become interesting.’

Two weeks before: ‘I knew it. He threw me inside, possibly thinking I can’t get out. He tried to murder me. He’s the real killer. I’m so excited I can barely control my breath!’

A week before: ‘I GOT HIM. GOODBYE, BOREDOM.’

That was the last entry.

Adachi froze, unable to form thoughts. Were all those her diary? Other notebooks were filled with various drawings and memos, seemingly thrown out of context, and each was at least as weird as those he just read. The frustrating thing was that Adachi still couldn’t make sense of _any_ of it.

Still, (Y/N) seemed to treat all this affair like a game to keep herself entertained—just like him.

No, he wasn’t afraid or disturbed by (Y/N)’s weird quirks. If anything, he was _pleased_. His soulmate never disappointed him.

“Adachi-san, are you here?”

There was a voice from the front door and Adachi cursed under his breath. He should have expected her to catch him red-handed. And it was exciting somehow.

He quickly looked around the room for possible places to hide, but the room was so small and empty there was no way he could possibly fool her.

“Don’t worry, I can tell when someone is in my house. Especially if it’s my sweet killer Persona-user boyfriend,” (Y/N) sang, her voice approaching the door to her bedroom.

Adachi quickly put the notebook in the drawer, closing it hurriedly, and lay on her bed for lack of a better idea. The door opened soon after.

“Adachi-san?” she sounded surprised at the sight. “Did you break into my house just to sleep in my bed?”

“Well,” Adachi smirked, “I missed you. Is this a crime?”

Giggling at his amusing response, (Y/N) went up to the bed, sat next to Adachi and affectionately kissed his lips. He eagerly complied, making her lay down next to him, despite the bed’s narrowness.

After a while she pulled away, strange twinkle in her eyes.

“Did you find anything of your interest?” That annoying innocent smile never left her lips.

“What are you talking about?”

“Come on, Adachi-san. Are we partners or not?” (Y/N) snorted. “I know you were _dying_ to look into me. I just hope I didn’t disappoint you.”

Adachi played with her hair, pretending to think deeply about something. In return, she started undoing his tie.

“Hmm,” his gaze lingered on her lips. “And what if I say you didn’t?”

“That would be highly satisfactory.”

(Y/N)’s face was so serious that Adachi let out a short laugh.

“To hell with this. I don’t really care what you do or what you think.”

After this, he pulled her closer, kissing her possessively. She giggled to the kiss and threw his tie behind her.


	5. infatuation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am aware that this story is messed up and probably makes no sense, but hell, it's way too fun for me to write.

“Uh, I-I am coming already! Sorry, Doujima-san wouldn’t let me go earlier…”

“ _I see, it’s alright. I’m waiting at my house, then._ ”

Adachi hung up, feeling as stupid as he hadn’t in quite a while. Doujima-san forced him to come over for a dinner, and while Yuu-kun’s cooking was nice, (Y/N) didn’t sound happy when he phoned her that he would be late by two hours. The fact that Adachi had to play _nice guy_ in front of his boss didn’t help, too.

“Okay, go to her already,” Doujima said nonchalantly, lighting a cigarette. “She must be tired of waiting now.”

 _Wasn’t it you who forced me to make her wait?_ , Adachi thought bitterly. But then again, their ‘relationship’ was already deep enough for Adachi’s acquaintances to get tired of (Y/N) being constantly around him—probably.

Deep down Adachi knew Doujima was happy for them. What a pain.

“T-thank you, Doujima-san. Yuu-kun, it was delicious,” Adachi waved at the smiling boy in the kitchen and quickly excused himself.

Driving to (Y/N)’s house, Adachi wondered what made her so angry. Was she on her period on something? She mentioned numerous times that her research was going well, so it’s not like she was short of ‘research materials’. She probably wanted to manipulate him, as always—and damn if that didn’t succeed. There he was, rushing to her like she had him by the short and curlies.

Well, whatever. He even stopped minding that.

When Adachi rang the bell to (Y/N)’s house, nothing happened for over two minutes. Glancing at his unbranded watch, he raised his hand to ring it again, but then (Y/N) finally opened the door, a slight pout on her face. He noticed her hair was messy and her clothes were anything but girly or elegant—she looked like she was sick and stayed home all day.

Ah, (Y/N) never failed to surprise him.

“Hey, how’re you?”

Adachi tried a kind greeting, but she only shrugged and let him inside, not even looking at him. He frowned. Talk about moody women.

Thinking of ways to find out what’s wrong, Adachi unzipped his coat, but before he could even take his shoes off, he felt (Y/N)’s arms around him.

The hell?

“…(Y/N)?” he uttered, taken aback.

No response. She pulled away after a while, miserable expression on her face.

“Sorry,” she sighed. “I got jealous that you chose to spend time with other people. How immature of me.”

“…What?” he was honestly shocked.

“It wouldn’t be fair if I tried to stop you from seeing others. I’m sorry.”

(Y/N) fiddled with her fingers, looking troubled, while Adachi had no idea what was going on. He wasn’t sure if she was playing her game or if that was genuine; either way, that was one really peculiar behaviour. (Y/N) apology felt too out of place—like she truly regretted something.

She might have been twisted, but such words don’t usually come out of nowhere… right?

Feeling a sudden rush of amusement, Adachi pulled her close and ruffled her hair playfully.

“No need to be jealous, you know,” he felt like he was explaining simple things to a child. “It’s not like I care about other people. That‘s just my façade, and you already saw through it.”

For some reason, stating the obvious wasn’t frustrating anymore.

(Y/N)’s face lit up as she took Adachi’s hands in hers.

“You’re not honest at all,” she giggled.

“Of course I’m not,” he snorted. “What else do you expect?”

No response; (Y/N) only tightened her grip on his palms and led him to her bedroom. Adachi followed her, kinda curious as to what she planned.

When they stepped inside, (Y/N) spun on her heel to face him. For some unknown reason she was flushed now.

“Nothing. I just think your façade might have become a little bit real.”

“How come?”

“But you know, Adachi-san…” ignoring his question, she looked at him with half-lidded eyes, “this is the sole difference between us.”

“What do you mean?” he asked, visibly amused.

“You think human bonds are troublesome and desperately avoid them.”

Adachi shrugged. “’Cause they are.”

“Well, that’s probably right. However, no human being can do so. The more you run away, the more persistently they come back.”

(Y/N)’s expression was unreadable and Adachi briefly recalled Douijma-san’s bothersome support. Fuck, things started to get out of control.

“And yet, you deceive yourself, thinking you’re managing to escape…”

Before he could say anything, (Y/N) pulled Adachi to her bed, hugging his neck and inhaling the scent of his cheap cologne. Her hair tickled his skin—and somewhere, in another world, Adachi felt himself bringing her closer. Damn, he couldn’t think straight. He even started thinking she _truly_ was right. Not good, not good at all.

“So… what was that difference between us…?” he murmured absentmindedly.

“You despise human bonds… while I think they are _extremely useful_.”

Adachi glanced down at (Y/N). She said that with her eyes closed, nuzzling closer to his body, looking almost innocent. Not even her voice suited the disturbing words she’d just uttered; all of a sudden, Adachi found that fascinating.

Maybe that difference between them was enough to keep Adachi from fully knowing (Y/N), but they were too similar anyway. He couldn’t figure her out—she opened up to him herself.

Because she was as bored as he was.

“I can’t say I’m surprised…” Adachi laughed, gently grasping her chin. He felt funny, almost like he was drunk—just what the hell had she done to him?

“That’s why I won’t get all possessive on you. You should take advantage of your bonds, too.”

He nodded, not processing he did that. His fingers played with (Y/N)’s hair and then with the collar of her T-shirt.

“I don’t even mind if you use me,” (Y/N) caressed his cheek. “Because I am different, aren’t I? I know who you are… I am your only genuine bond, Tooru.”

“Yes,” he agreed despite not using his voice.

Her whisper, her scent, her warmth infatuated him. He wrapped his arms around her smaller body, not sure what was true anymore.

He spent the night at her house, and woke up before dawn, his memory fuzzy. (Y/N)’s small frame laying beside him felt out of place and in the right place at the same time.

That’s when he realized: she was dangerous.

 _Very_ dangerous.

But he could ignore that for a little longer.


	6. four letter word

“So, how is the investigation going, Tooru?”

Adachi glanced at (Y/N), who was currently reading a book while he rested his head on her lap. Such intimacy was not strange for them anymore; she even started calling him by his first name when they were alone, not only in public—just like she’d said before, the façade might have become a little bit real. Adachi didn’t mind.

“Fine, I guess,” he murmured, nuzzling his face to her side. “We caught a guy who kidnapped people and he’ll probably be sentenced soon. Why are you asking?”

“No reason. I simply thought it would be a pity if you were found.”

Before he could stop himself, Adachi rose abruptly. His eyes found (Y/N)’s surprised ones, but she didn’t seem to care about his sudden reaction.

Was she doing this on purpose? Was she trying to tell him she’d betray him?—Or maybe he was just going paranoid, ‘cause both of them knew Adachi wouldn’t let that slide?

Damn, he wasn’t supposed to let anyone mess with his mind like that.

“Hey, stop panicking,” (Y/N) said calmly, looking back at her book. “As I’ve said multiple times before, I will never reveal your secret. I only asked because I’m concerned about you.”

“Yeah… Thanks a lot,” Adachi snorted.

“It’s true. Don’t you know that?”

He waved his hand as if to say he didn’t feel like continuing this pointless conversation.

(Y/N) got back to reading her book and Adachi, with nothing to do but lie beside her, started observing her face to occupy himself. Focused eyes, slightly covered by silky bangs; oblong chin; flawless skin. She could be a model or an actress and nobody would ever question her charm.

Just how in the world did such a person become— _this_?

“Hey, Tooru?”

Her voice snapped him back to reality.

“Yeah, what is it?” he tried to sound indifferent, but with little effect.

“Do you think what is between us can be called ‘love’?”

Her sudden question perplexed him for a second, and then he almost burst out laughing.

Love? Love was simply a lie told by stupid and naïve people, an excuse to justify whatever shit they do. It was a way of proving oneself right, despite being _wrong_.

In other words, Adachi was of opinion that love didn’t exist. Anything that mattered in this shitty world was luck, nothing else. He knew that well—it wasn’t until recently he finally got his deal of good fortune, after all.

“Where did that come from?” he let out a short laugh, hoping (Y/N) would take that as a sign of tenderness or something. It wasn’t a good time to show his worse side.

“The book I’m reading now explains different aspects of social psychology. It made me wonder about various matters…” (Y/N) looked somewhat abashed. “Such as happiness, love, and so on. Am I weird?”

No, not at all!

At first, Adachi thought it was pretty arrogant of her—thinking of happiness in their context. Neither he nor her could probably ever feel true happiness; but then again, love doesn’t necessarily mean ‘happiness’.

Fuck, she made him think of unnecessary things yet again.

“Hn, I can’t really say anything about that,” Adachi admitted. “How about you?”

“Let’s see…” (Y/N) tapped her chin, deep in thought. “Of course, I’m not foolish enough to try to explain ‘love’ as a term. It’s best to leave that for people who’ve got too much time,” she smiled slightly and he thought she was one hell of a thinker. A logical one. Deadly combo. “But if we look at our situation, it might actually fit, don’t you agree?”

“…Huh?”

(Y/N) closed the book and put it aside, a glimpse of melancholy in her eyes. When her hands reached Adachi’s hair and started playing with it, her expression was back to the normal, calm one.

“Love is a bond between people. It requires similarities as well as differences, and is built upon mutual trust and understanding. I think it’s quite similar to us—trust aside, of course.”

That was smart. She basically robbed Adachi of all possible ways to laugh at her. Despite all nonsense she was saying, he actually felt faint admiration for her methodology.

Neither of them could understand what love was. More like they were desperately trying to fill the gap, created because of their _incapability_ to love.

So—it might actually have been the same. Don’t people say love has many faces?

“You’re half right,” Adachi stated, looking at (Y/N) with smug expression. “I’d say we pretend we can love because that’s what this shitty world want us to.”

“So when we’re alone, we don’t have to pretend?” finished (Y/N), face filled with delight. “That’s a splendid definition of love, Tooru.”

Adachi sighed in resignation, knowing he would never completely understand her mind. And it was okay.

“I don’t think anyone beside us would agree to that, (Y/N).”

“And that’s why we’re destined to be together,” she looked him in the eye, face devoid of emotion, yet somehow peaceful at the same time. “Once together, always together.”

Bewildered, he looked away, unconsciously putting on an expression of clumsiness—the one he always wore outside _their world_.

“Haha, gimme a break, (Y/N)… That was so cliché.”

She only smiled. “I know. Maybe I’m too old-fashioned, but I actually find those appealing.”

“What? Is your Persona a Magatsu Izanami or something?”

The joke didn’t make much sense; Adachi said it subconsciously, not even realising the absurdity behind it. And he most certainly didn’t expect (Y/N) to get flustered all of a sudden.

“Haha, of course not! That would be too cliché even for my tastes,” she laughed, grabbing her book, as if to have her hands busy. “I guess I’m just comfortable with the present situation… With you there.”

A tender smile on her lips was enough to make Adachi brush his doubts off. He pulled her down to his level, fingers locked with hers, and kissed her slowly. She give in to the kiss, somewhat hesitant—but with all she could possibly give him.


	7. nightswimming

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kinda late to develop the plot like that, but better late than never, I guess?

She woke up abruptly, memories of a nightmare still fresh in her mind.

Panting slightly, (Y/N) sat up, making sure not to wake up the man sleeping beside her. The room was shrouded in grim dusk; it must have been short before dawn, as faint sunlight was slowly finding its way to through the windows. Outside, the moon shone creepily.

The woman—or maybe still a girl—rubbed her temples in exhaustion, but no relief came.

“… _Damn_.”

She carefully bent down, holding back her breath, and pulled her most important notebook from under the bed.

With shaking palm, she wrote the following:

‘Why must it be <acceptance>?’


	8. blood on the line

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhh, this chapter was soooo hard to edit... *faints*

She was lying there, body twisted, blood on her side, blood on the floor.

Adachi’s eyes widened slightly at the sight as he staggered, leaning against the door for support. Shit. Vomiting in front of Doujima-san had always been a bit of play, but even now he could feel his stomach turn upside down. Breathing heavily, he coughed in his fist. Good—maybe he wouldn’t throw up just now.

(Y/N) looked almost as bad as his victims on telephone poles, except that she wasn’t dead—yet. He could tell just by glancing that she needed help; no rush, it wasn’t that serious, but blood loss was sometimes enough to make people sleep and never wake up again. The wound in her side looked as if a wild animal tore off a piece of her flesh. Plus, she seemed to suffer from some impact, like she fell from somewhere…

Adachi quickly put two and two together: (Y/N) had a delightful encounter in Midnight Channel, and that’s what she got. Maybe Shadows attacked her. Maybe it were the brats from the pants-shitting investigation team, thinking she was the killer. Either way, she ended up in _deep shit_.

The look on her face, however, was almost that of satisfaction. Despite tears of pain forming in her eyes, she managed to curl her lips up in a tired smile as she noticed Adachi standing by the door to her living room.

“To… oru…”

He had to strain his ears to hear her weak voice. What surprised him, however, was that she didn’t beg for help or even reach out her hand to him. She just lay there, half-dead, suffering, quiet.

Forcing himself to keep his breakfast where it belonged, Adachi carefully took a step towards (Y/N). Her smile widened slightly the more he approached, as if he was the best thing she could see in her last moments.

“What have you got yourself into?” he asked, a hint of worry in his voice. She let out a short laugh, which made her wince in pain a second later.

“No idea… Probably the same as you.”

Adachi frowned. It sounded like a threat, even though (Y/N) couldn’t do as much as move her little finger.

“What the hell?” he hissed, kicking her twisted leg. Despite not giving the kick much force, (Y/N) let out a quiet yelp of pain. “You’re not in the position to get all cocky, y’know. I’ve got enough of your scheming.”

“Haha… Yeah,” (Y/N) weakly wiped some blood off the corner of her mouth. “But I waited for you.”

Adachi laughed bitterly. “You _waited_? Why? I’m a killer. Don’t you know you might die if you stick around with me? Look at you.”

“I know. And I… don’t mind,” she coughed, smile never leaving her lips. “I think I just took a liking in you.”

Without a second thought, Adachi bent down with inhuman speed, encircling her neck with his palms. His face froze in an expression of gloomy focusing and for the first time in a long, _long_ while, he felt like he was doing the right thing.

(Y/N) was evil. She was his weakness—and he didn’t feel like having more weaknesses than absolutely necessary.

If anything, he regretted he hadn’t got rid of her earlier.

“That’s right… Go ahead, Tooru.”

Adachi looked down at her, madness in his eyes, but she was still smiling. Her blooded hands reached to his palms in almost encouraging manner.

Something beyond Adachi’s comprehension was going on.

“If it makes you feel better, kill me. I can’t do _anything_ , after all…”

How in the hell did she manage to say this much if she was barely alive?

Of course, that wasn’t the problem—he simply had never seen anyone who would _willingly_ choose to die.

Was it strange? Or was _he_ strange?

“Don’t give me any of that shit,” Adachi uttered, trying to sound intimidating. “I’ve put up with you way too long. Got any last words or something?”

(Y/N)’s breath was now shallow and short; she slowly shook her hand.

“Better for you. Have you ever thought about your speech pattern? You sound like an old lady…”

What the hell? Was he getting fucking _sentimental_? His hands should just clutch her neck and end that pitiful life of hers…

Nothing happened.

“Stop it, Tooru. I’m serious.”

“Serious about what?”

“If you’re to kill me, just do it already. I don’t mind, but even I’m not masochistic enough to bear your torture,” she coughed again.

Adachi had never been so enraged. Even while dying, (Y/N) managed to piss him out. He just _couldn’t_ see her through, not even now.

“Why?!” he didn’t mean to yell, but rage took over him. “Why are you always so… so…” words failed him. “So docile?”

Blood mixed with tears slowly slid down (Y/N) cheek, reaching her sad smile.

“Yes… I wouldn’t put it better myself. It’s probably just another difference between us,” she mumbled, words barely audible anymore. “You’d never agree to die like this… right?”

Adachi’s palms trembled upon her neck, but did nothing to choke her.

His mind was filled with thoughts, such as ‘Why are you hesitating?’ or ‘Stop thinking, that’s what she wants you to’, and yet, he couldn’t even move.

It was the best—and probably the last—opportunity to get rid of this problematic whore. (Y/N) was dangerous. She could reveal his true identity, destroy him, rob him of every single good thing he had in this shitty world—and heavens know there weren’t many of them. Everything related to her could bring Adachi to his demise…

And most dangerous, most deadly fact of all—Adachi actually grew fond of her.

As she looked at him with those teary, honest eyes, his palms remained motionless, almost powerless. Finally, he cursed under his breath and got up, letting go of the wounded woman.

“I can’t believe what I’m doing,” he answered the voiceless question written all over her face. “Better think of a story to tell at the hospital.”

“W-what?” she managed to mutter.

“Shut up before I change my mind.”

But he wouldn’t change his mind. As he took out his cellphone, (Y/N)’s face slowly filled with glee.

“So… she was right after all…”


	9. deeper and deeper

(Y/N) expected to get released from hospital after a day, two at most, but her wounds apparently were too serious; a week passed and she still couldn’t go home. All the nurses and doctors luckily believed her story that she ‘was attacked by the killer and barely made it out alive’—which actually wasn’t that far from truth.

All that time Adachi kept visiting her; shortly afterwards Doujima-san and Nanako-chan ended up in the very same hospital, along with Namatame, making Adachi practically start living there. The bad thing, though, was that the detective wannabes were running around too.

On the eight day of (Y/N)’s hospitalisation, Adachi visited her again.

She sat on her bed, looking through the window with a dreamy expression. As soon as Adachi stepped inside, her face lit up like a lampion during some festival. He smiled at her.

“How are you?”

“I wish I could just go home already, it’s so boring in here,” she flashed him a weak smile, followed by a small frown. “I’ve heard you’re overworking yourself. I’m sorry about the incident with Doujima-san, but you really should take some rest.”

Adachi laughed sheepishly. “It’s no big deal. If anything, I don’t like those brats sniffing around.”

“Brats?”

“Oh, you’ve met Yuu-kun and Yousuke-kun, right? It seems they founded some sort of investigation team along with their shitty friends,” he explained, smirking bitterly. “They think they can do police’s job. Idiots.”

Worried look in her eyes, (Y/N) lightly squeezed his palm.

“Be careful, then.”

“I will.”

He kissed her goodbye and left the hospital room, not knowing he wouldn’t see her for another month.

* * *

Soon enough, (Y/N)’s days became dull and monotone. She couldn’t comprehend why she was still stuck there in hospital, her well-being practically restored now. But the doctors insisted her wounds hadn’t completely healed yet—so, bored to death, she complied, keeping her docile attitude.

Adachi’s visits gradually became shorter, while he seemed to be more and more nervous.

Nurses loved gossiping, so (Y/N) was always up to date with all the news regarding the ‘Inaba killer investigation’. What she heard certainly didn’t make her any more reassured, but it would have been worse if she hadn’t known anything.

Another few days later, she woke up to see a familiar man coming into her room.

“You are… Doujima-san?” quickly sitting up, (Y/N) bowed her head. A visit from her boyfriend’s boss required some manners.

“No need to be formal now,” Doujima gestured at her, discarding the social conventions. “This isn’t time to be thinking about such trifles.”

“Sorry? What do you—”

The man sat down beside (Y/N)’s bed, face troubled and tired. She felt her heart race; something was really wrong.

“Adachi disappeared, despite not even leaving the hospital. Now my nephew is looking for him, together with his friends.”

(Y/N) kept quiet, waiting for Doujima to finish. He let out a heavy sigh before continuing:

“…He ran away after they implied he might be the killer.”

“What?!” (Y/N) gasped in shock, though it wasn’t exactly the kind of shock the policeman might have expected. How on earth did they found out? “I-it’s not possible!”

“I’d like to believe that, too,” Doujima sighed again, “but unfortunately, there’s a strong possibility. I’m sorry you heard it from me, under such unpleasant circumstances. I just felt like you should know.”

Covering her mouth with her palms, (Y/N) remained breathless for a while, sudden wave of dread going over her.

So it happened. Again, she could only sit and look. Even though she warned Adachi—even though she told him to be careful—everything got destroyed.

Fate, or more like curse, came after Inaba.

And she’d known _all along_.

“(L/N)-san? Are you okay?”

Doujima tried to reach out for her, but she couldn’t hear him. Frightened, desperate, she curled in her sheets, unwanted tears threatening to spill from her eyes.

Everything felt frustrating all the time—but she’d never felt so _powerless_.

“(L/N)-san!”

When his calls had no effect, Douijma hurriedly got up from his chair, deciding he should go for a nurse. However, (Y/N) calmed down a second before he reached the door.

“I-I’m sorry, I’m okay now,” she uttered. “I just… can’t believe that. How could Tooru…”

“I know. It shocked me too,” Doujima sighed miserably, sitting back.

“He was always so kind and caring… Sure, he had his moments, but I’d never think…”

The man put a hand on her shoulder in a reassuring manner. He was smiling, though pain was visible in that smile.

“Even if it’s true, we need to believe in him, (Y/N).”

“Believe?” she sobbed, wiping her eyes. “But isn’t it contradicting the police’s job, believing in a criminal…?”

Doujima shook his head. “Maybe it is, but we should believe in him as his friends. It’s never wrong.”

(Y/N) looked up at him, a bit bewildered.

This man—an old policeman who happened to be hospitalised at the same time as her, came all the way to tell her bad news; to cheer her up afterwards, even. All because she was his partner’s girlfriend, someone close to him, someone who’d be the most traumatised after all that shit.

So Tooru wasn’t as alienated as he claimed to be… He even had people who cared for him.

As (F/n) smiled back at Douijma, a tear fell from her eye—a genuine one this time.


	10. winner takes nothing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Before you proceed, let me warn you:  
> I actually didn't finish Persona 4 and all my knowledge about the ending is based on what I watched on YouTube. I even watched Arena Ultimax Episode Adachi multiple times, but I'm still not sure if I got Adachi's motives right. Thus, if this chapter contains errors or contradicts the canon plot in any way... please ignore it or try to think of it as an AU or something.  
> Also, you get bonus points if you recognise the songs in the chapter titles *wink wink*  
> Enjoy!

Adachi sighed, picking up a piece of lotus root from his _bentou_. He looked at it from the top down, as if to make it disappear, but nothing happened. With a miserable expression, he hesitated, chopstick hovering upon the _bentou_ box.

“Stop making faces and eat up already!” barked a guard, looking at him threateningly.

“Yeah, yeah…”

Not minding the guard’s complaints, Adachi decided he was hungry enough to ignore the horrible taste of lotus root. Munching down his food, he desperately tried not to grimace.

“Hah… It’s delicious,” Adachi exclaimed, purposefully making his voice loud enough for the guard to hear. “I wonder how they prepare it?”

The guard, however, ignored him; Adachi slowly leaned against the wall, feeling like shit.

Such idiotic remarks were his only entertainment since he’d got arrested—in other words, since about a month ago. Since then, all he had was awful food, guards yelling at him for no reason and stupid cops with their useless interrogations. But that’s what he deserved, right? From time to time, Adachi even had to admit living in lockup was amusing.

“Number 82, you’ve got a visitor!”

…Yup, really amusing.

Adachi leaned forward, questioningly looking at the guard. A visitor? The investigation wasn’t done yet, but Adachi was 99,99% sure they’d sentence him to get the shit over with. Everyone in the town was aware of that, too.

So—who in hell would visit him?

“Are you gonna see her or not?”

Oh. It was a _she_.

“…Yeah, coming.”

* * *

When they let him into the meeting room and shoved him a receiver, the first thing Adachi noticed was that (Y/N) didn’t seem radiant and elegant like she always did. Not at all. Clad in grey, anonymous clothes, she gave off a vibe of silent mourning; her silky hair neatly ran down her shoulder, while her eyes, devoid of emotions, were set on the ground.

Wow, he thought, talk about surprise.

When she raised her eyes at him, a weak gleam flickered in her orbs. Despite all gloominess she emanated, the corners of her lips curled up in a somewhat forced smile. She approached the other side of the glass and sat down, lifting up the receiver.

For a second, they remained motionless, separated by mere glass, yet so far away.

Adachi strained his ears, unsure whether he should speak up first or not. All that situation felt weird, as if time had stopped between them.

“H-hey,” he muttered, finally able to control his voice. “Long time no see.”

“Greetings, Tooru.”

Looking down, Adachi covered his lips with his palm, trying to hide a smile. She might have looked like her family got killed, but her weird mannerism never changed.

“Why are you here? How did they even let you here? Killers before sentence don’t usually get visitors,” he started jokingly.

“I figured so. That’s why I’m here now, and not on the very day after you were arrested.”

“So you showed them, huh?”

“Yeah…”

There was a meaningful silence between them. (Y/N)’s fingers absentmindedly played with the phone cord, while she seemed to be looking for words, deep frown clouding her features. Adachi waited.

Finally, she spoke up—her voice on verge of cracking.

“…I think I owe you an apology.”

Adachi looked up at her, surprised. Light reflecting on the glass made (Y/N)’s weak smile look like one of a ghost.

“I don’t think I’m following,” he uttered.

“You are aware that you were used by Izanami, correct?”

“…Yeah,” Adachi’s gaze lingered somewhere above her head.

“Just as Yuu Narukami and Tarou Namatame were?”

“Mm, I know. It’s not like she killed those two whores, though.”

(Y/N)’s lips trembled a little as she sighed. “Yes, I am aware of that… But there’s something else you don’t know.”

Adachi nodded, persuading her to continue. There were already many things he didn’t know, no big deal.

Still hesitating, (Y/N) took a deep breath before picking up.

“Each of you had a role to play. And I…” she bit her lip. “I had one too.”

“You mean that bitch gave you a Persona, just like she did to us?”

“Better. Izanami—or should I say one of her forms?— _was_ my Persona.”

Whoa! Adachi leaned on his chair, taken aback. That was unexpected. Or maybe not as unexpected, it was (Y/N) we’re talking about, after all.

”Remember when you found me soaking in my own blood? She was the one who injured me back then after I confronted her in Midnight Channel,” (Y/N) twirled a strand of her hair between her fingers. “But our first encounter took place a long time ago. She told me everything about her plan and how she bestowed Personas to certain individuals in Inaba. I was one of them… the one who represented ‘acceptance’.”

Adachi frowned. “The hell?”

“It means I was simply an insurance for her schemes, unable to change anything. All along, I knew what fate awaited you. I knew you’d face the cruelest of defeats. And yet, because I was ‘acceptance’… I could only look at it helplessly.”

As her voice became quieter, (Y/N) lowered her head, guilty look in her eyes.

“I wanted to stop her, I really did. I wanted to save you from ending up like this, because I felt we were similar, if only a bit. But in the end, I couldn’t do anything,” she raised her face to look Adachi in the eye, resolve spread on her face. ”I know those words are meaningless now, but I am really sorry…”

Adachi froze for a second, at first not really knowing what she was talking about. Then, it struck him. Izanami, himself, Yuu-kun, Namatame—and finally, (Y/N). All of them were entwined in some sort of a twisted game, one that couldn’t be changed.

“Hey, stop that already,” Adachi hurriedly tried to prevent her from tearing up. He felt like seeing her cry would completely contradict the image of (Y/N) he had imprinted in his mind. “You shouldn’t be apologising. We were all marionettes in that bitch’s hand, and I already decided to make up for my sins.”

“…Oh?” (Y/N)’s eyes gleamed with careful curiosity. What a sly woman.

“You heard me. After I get sentenced, I won’t even say a word. Maybe except for pissing the guards off. They’re really amusing when they’re angry,” he snickered.

(Y/N) returned his smile, for the first time not looking incredibly depressed. She even giggled like she used to. Adachi looked down.

Another awkward moment of silence. There wasn’t much they got to say to each other anymore.

“You know, Tooru…”

“Yea, what is it?”

“I was honest back then. I really took a liking in you,” (Y/N) smiled somewhat sadly, and then her lips trembled slightly. “I… I am going to miss you.”

Adachi felt a lump in his throat, unable to say anything.

It wasn’t supposed to be like that. He thought he’d spent a peaceful year, or two, in jail, severed from the reality he’d once belonged to. He thought he’d atone for his sins, and do it in solitude.

But apparently, he was _so_ wrong.

Adachi lost the game. It was a painful defeat, but not a fatal one. There was nothing left for him anymore, except for his rules—and his bonds.

“Yeah,” he forced a smile, hoping it wasn’t too wry. “Me too.”

“I’m really sorry it turned this way.”

Adachi shook his head. “No, it's fine. It’s fine as it is.”

(Y/N) nodded, and he could see tears shining in her eyes. Damned woman, she had him wrapped around her little finger all along… But maybe it wasn’t so bad, huh?

Visiting time was almost over now. (Y/N) stood up, visibly trying to regain her composure, and failing helplessly.

“I wish you best of luck then. May you find peace.”

“Thanks.”

“So…” her voice in the receiver sounded like angelic lamentation, “I guess it’s time to bid my farewell?”

“Wait.”

Surprised, she stopped in her tracks. Adachi was shocked himself, not even processing he just called after her. It came out automatic. And it was _alright_.

“Can you… visit me sometimes?”

Her eyes widened for a second—and then a smile appeared on her face.

Putting down the receiver, she nodded.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The story ends here. Thank you everyone who took time to read it.


End file.
